Married Staying True to Yourself

Updated: Jun 26

Marriage Standing the Test of Time

I am a mother of one, stepmom to three, and devoted wife to a great man. I have been married twelve years and everyday is something new. From restarting my career, to emptying nesting, to experimenting with my mate, I have to stay open to new ideas and opportunities.

My husband and I were 30 and 31 years old when we got married. We both had children from other relationships and did not desire to have any more. We talked about traveling, raising our kids and living comfortably. We didn’t pay much thought to semantics like: who would pay the bills, disciplining the kids, or previous financial obligations (in detail). This oversight caused for a very rocky marriage and we decided to live apart for a while, in hopes of figuring out what we both wanted.

During our separation, we both dated other people and gained separate experiences. There was still a mutual attraction and desire to be together and keep our family together. But how? Would he be open to this? Can we work after separation? How has our actions affected our children? Would we be wasting our time? These were a lot of the questions I asked and need answers to in order to move on.

We sought professional help for a while to learn how to communicate with each other better. We had to figure out how to compromise our thoughts and dreams. How to merge two worlds into one. How can we rekindled and continue to work on these same things because, as we know, relationships are work. However, we communicate differently now, we spend more time together and with other married couples.

I share my story because I am married, but not without scars. I see myself as blessed to have another opportunity to live my life with my soul partner. Life is full of surprises and second chances; do not allow your pride to possess your destiny!

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